One of the most common groups I come across when it comes to pregnancy anxiety are those who’ve suffered a loss or infertility. They can feel a little out of place from the pregnancy world and need more specialised and continuous support to manage their anxieties.
If you’re expecting your rainbow baby or had a tough time with infertility or IVF, here are 5 things you can do to manage your pregnancy anxiety:
Take it one milestone at a time
It can be really overwhelming just thinking about your next scan, let alone the full 38 weeks. Every flutter, every movement (or lack of) can be filled with anxiety. To make this easier, take one milestone at a time. Whether this is the next day, or your next midwife appointment, focus on your short-term steps and celebrate each milestone.
Take your time preparing
You might see other parents-to-be excited to buy the furniture, pick out the clothes and start painting the nursery. You don’t have to feel this you should be doing the same, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong if you don’t feel excited. You don’t have to have everything prepared early and to be honest, a lot of it can wait until after birth. If it lessens your anxiety, wait until you’re completely ready to start buying things.
Calming techniques
There are so many things out there to help you feel more calm, and manage your anxiety. Yoga is amazing to help with physically feeling calm, but also with your mindset. Hypnobirthing techniques can help switch that trauma and stress to calm and confidence, on a subconscious level. Mindfulness is so powerful in helping you feel in the moment and focus less on the past or the future. Finally breathing exercises are so effective at helping you manage your anxiety symptoms as well as prevent your thoughts become overwhelming.
If you’d like to work on your breathing, mindset and learn hypnobirthing, check out the Birth Anxiety ➡ Baby Calm Programme.
Journaling
I know it can sound like it takes a lot of effort, but it can be as simple as jotting down a few words to express your feelings. It can be as little as 5 mins before bed. Journaling allows you to acknowledge, accept & express your thoughts, and help you to process them in a safe space. It helps to let go of your anxiety and not keep it inside your head. Many mums who journal find that they end up writing about things that they weren’t aware of before – it helps to increase self-awareness, validation and self-compassion.
Ask questions
With anxiety comes the constant doubting, questioning, and ‘what if’s’. To help combat these taking over your mind and becoming overwhelming, ask your midwife/antenatal teacher/pregnancy coach as many questions as you feel you need to feel like you have enough information. Also, avoid Google and social media to get the answers to your questions, unless you know it’s from a reputable source. Unfortunately, it can turn into a really unhealthy coping mechanism that actually feeds your anxiety instead of making it better.
Professional help
Getting pregnant after a loss or infertility can make your pregnancy feel very difficult. If you’re struggling to manage your thoughts, finding it difficult to sleep, or can’t stop worrying, get professional help. Talking therapy and effective anxiety management techniques can make a huge difference to you and your pregnancy, and it can also reduce the chances of postpartum anxiety and depression.
If you need help to manage your anxiety and negative thoughts, send me a message or click here to go straight to my calendar to book in a free 30 min chat on Zoom. We’ll talk through your how anxiety is showing up for you, how you’d like to feel instead and how I can help you get there.
Bean 
Mum Calm is a 6-week programme to help you build a solid foundation and create your own toolbox to start mastering anxiety.
Keeping It Calm is a monthly programme where you’ll consistent, person-centred support and guidance for as long as you need.